Question 

I have 2 questions: First: My daughter who is 5 years old is a very picky eater. She is five years old and takes so long to eat. Can you help me? Second: I do my best to provide good food for my children, but they have access to so much junk food around school and elsewhere. What can I do to make them make good food decisions of their own?

Answer

As salamu `alaykum

The problems you are facing are typical for a child of that age. They are more physically active, so they have lots of energy to burn, lots to do, lots to prove and no time to do it all.

A friend of mine faced the same problem, which meant preparing food for her children was not a joyful or thankful task. If your children are going to prove difficult each time you prepare food for them to eat, then both you and the children are bound to feel anxious about it all.

My friend’s family were meat eaters, and we were not. For the first time in 11 years, she and her husband had decided to take that long weekend off for themselves. They never had a moment’s break, not even time for a honeymoon. So, I was the candidate to take on her children so that she could have a well deserved break.

So, we were to spend one weekend with temporary additions to our family, full of boundles energy and generally not used to taking time-out for quiet periods. So an eventful weekend it was with outings to the local (massive park), which turned into an adventure. We took a picnic, went sailing, climbing, walking through the forest… etc.

We returned to to make supper and tell “Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark” stories and literally turned the reception area into a cave. What is the point of me sharing this with you? Well, their days were full of activity and as such had healthy appetites for each meatless mealtime.

They ate their fill and whatever was on the plate was where it should be, in their stomachs. They had little appetite in-between, but had room for some treats, which were already bought in.

They would have crisps, one packet of sweets and homemade milk shakes, which are rather filling.

When their parents returned to collect them at the end of the weekend, they naturally thought we must have had a difficult time as far as food was concerned, but they were surprised that there was bursting to tell them what they did and that there were no food complaints.

The long and short of it all is, when children make the most of their day, and eat full meals at meal times, they are less likely to eat junk, because fresh fruits, vegetables along with pulses and grains are filling foods because they contain lots of roughage, which provides the bulk from plant food for the digestive system to work on.

This does not mean that your children should not eat meat, but it just goes to show, how much junk food provides empty calories that do not satisfy ones hunger. This makes treats remain treats and not alternatives to food. With our daughter at that age, I never bought treats with her around so that she would not develop that habit that she could have what she wanted. What I did was to but in treats for the week, and in this way, the treats would be considered allowable, and not the forbidden that she would hanker after.

By establishing a pattern at home, your children will develop the habit of eating at mealtimes, which also sets up a pattern for their digestive system. In this way, they will unconsciously become food-wise because they develop a limit as to what they can eat and how much in-between mealtimes.

In the U.K. they is developing trend of returning back to family mealtimes instead of  take-aways as a means to overcome their growing problem of obesity. By eating together as a family, there is a more relaxed environment with less distractions as to who-is-doing-what, – and – if –they – can – I – can – too syndrome. In a relaxed state one eats more, enjoys more what one is eating and is more able to digest properly.