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General Fatwa Session

Sheikh Kifah Mustapha
05 October, 2017

Dear Brothers/Sisters,

 

Thank you very much for joining us in this Live Fatwa session. We would like also to thank our guest, Sheikh Kifah Mustapha, for answering the questions directed to him. You will find the answers of your questions below.

Saturday, Oct. 07, 2017 | 16:00 - 18:00 GMT

Session is over.

Assalaamu aleykum (from email) Assalaamu aleykum, Please, I would like to know if this Hadiith is correct or it based on any authentic narration: Narrated Abdullah Ibn Abbas: The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said to al-Abbas ibn AbdulMuttalib: Abbas, my uncle, shall I not give you, shall I not present to you, shall I not donate to you, shall I not produce for you ten things? If you act upon them, Allah will forgive you your sins, first and last, old and new, involuntary and voluntary, small and great, secret and open. These are the ten things: you should pray four rak'ahs, reciting in each one Fatihat al-Kitab and a surah. When you finish the recitation of the first rak'ah you should say fifteen times while standing: "Glory be to Allah", "Praise be to Allah", "There is no god but Allah", "Allah is most great". Then you should bow and say it ten times while bowing. Then you should raise your head after bowing and say it ten times. Then you should kneel down in prostration and say it ten times while prostrating yourself. Then you should raise your head after prostration and say it ten times. Then you should prostrate yourself and say it ten times. Then you should raise your head after prostrating and say it ten times in every rak'ah. You should do that in four rak'ahs. If you can observe it once daily, do so; if not, then once weekly; if not, then once a month; if not, then once a year; if not, then once in your lifetime. ‏Sunan Abu-Dawud (Prayer (Kitab Al-Salat): Voluntary Prayers) Reference : Sunan Abi Dawud 1297 In-book reference : Book 5, Hadith 48 Grade: Sahih (Al-Albani)



Wa `alaykum as-salamu wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.

 

This is called Salat Al-Tasabeeh or the prayer of lot of praises to Allah.

 

Most of the Hadiths narrated by Abu Dawud and At-Tirmidhi are in the status of weak. For that, many scholars do not approve of it.

 

Other scholars like An-Nawawi made it permissible as there more than one narration that might give legitimacy to the prayer.

 

The way I look at it, if someone said it is not allowed I respect his view but if another did pray it I do not make an issue out of it.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.

Why does Quran says to beat up your wife. looking for satisfactory answer in simple language



Wa `alaykum as-salamu wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.

 

There are two views on that:

 

One, after a proven case of misconduct by the wife, the husband should talk and advise his wife to stop. If she insists, the husband moves to a different way by showing no interest in intimacy with her and in case the wife still insisted; the husband uses a symbolic form of beating with a tooth brush as Ibn Abbas explained.

 

In any court or police report, if the wife claimed physical abuse from the husband, they look for proof which is mainly proven by marks. A tooth brush by no means will cause marks to the best of my knowledge. So it is a symbolic not physical.

 

Two, beating here in Arabic does not mean like hitting at all. It means to keep a distance between you and the other person. The term (Da Ra ba) means also linguistically to put distance.

 

I personally lean to the second interpretation and against any form of beating another person, wife, child, elderly etc. If you have issues with one, stay away and keep your distance.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.

What's Jihad ? and how I can do it without picking up swords and guns?



Wa `alaykum as-salamu wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.

 

Jihad is simply to put effort toward something. Media often portray Jihad only in the battle fighting format to utilize that as an attack on Islam and Muslims. Jihad is a term that incorporates all that which Muslims do. Praying, fasting, working, volunteering are all types of Jihad, the major one.

 

Now in case Muslims were under attack they can defend themselves and that is also called Jihad or they were in power and someone abused a nation, they must rise to defend the freedom of people and that is also called Jihad.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.

Make no mistake to take this question lightly this question made even the second calipha speechless think before you give the answer



Wa `alaykum as-salamu wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.

 

As to Heaven; the prophet (peace be upon him) said: Ask Allah Al-Firdaws, for it is the fine part of Heaven and the higher level of it and it is under the Throne of Allah.” (Al-Bukhari)

 

In another Hadith, we know that in the trip of Al-Isra’ and Al-Mi`raj the prophet (peace be upon him) went through the 7 skies until he reached the Throne of Allah. Se we can say, according to text it is under the Throne and over the 7th sky.

As to Hell, it is as Allah said: {surely the Book of the wicked is locked up in the depths of Sijjeen} and Sijjeen in the lower level of earth. And to that most of the scholars concluded that Hell is inside earth.

 

Keep in mind that Allah said that at the Day of Judgement both earth and sky will be changed and reshaped. {Warn them of the Day when the Earth and the Heavens shall be totally transformed.} 14:48 So no one can claim exact status of how it will be for it is of the world of Al-Ghaib.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.

assalamu alaikum Is eating of all type crab (rivar, sea) allowed in islam. Is eating of peafowl meet allowed in Islam?



Wa `alaykum as-salamu wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.

 

As to the first question, Allah said: {the game of water and eating its food is permissible} 5:96. For that all animals that live under water are lawful for consumption. In a Hadith the prophet (peace be upon him) said about sea that: it is pure for Wudu and dead animals of it are allowed for consumption. So for that yes, it is allowed.

 

Eating peafowl is also allowed as it is a normal bird like any other bird that feeds on seeds and grass. Only birds that hunt and feed on meat are prohibited.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.

 

 

 

Alsalamu Alaykom dear Scholar, I would like to know the Islamic/Shari'a view on a woman getting her tubes tied to prevent pregnancy, the woman is 42 years of age and had 4 children, the youngest being 4 years old, she has back problems and had gestational diabetes with her last pregnancy which was when she was 38 years old, is it permissible for her to get her tubes tied so prevent any further pregnancies? Jazakom Allah kol kheir for all you do.



Wa `alaykum as-salamu wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.

 

To tie tubes is one of the methods to regulate pregnancy, it is not permanent. To untie tubes, you can do a procedure called: tubal legation reversal. In Islam the prophet (peace be upon him) approved people’s basics method of controlling birth by discharging outside intercourse intimate relationship.

 

The utilization of such medical methods in our days is allowed based on that concept. Now if we add the age factor, medical problems and the case of having already kids’ al-hamudullilah, it should be allowed for you to tie your tubes even if it means no more children are possible.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.

I live in US and have been married for almost 18 years. My younger son aged 14 has autism with mental retardation. I have had problematic marriage since day one. I divorced my wife ten and five years ago but took her back before the end of iddah. Unfortunately things have never improved between us. Alhumdulila we are both practicing muslims but because of our frequent ups and downs, we indulge in back bitting etc against one another. There is hatred and no communication between the families. I fear ruining my akhirah because of our relationship. That is risk I don’t want to continue taking. I can divorce her the third time and get over everything but what is going to happen to my disabled son who is totally dependent on us. She takes care of him in the morning while I take care of him after work and on the weekends. Neither of us can take care of him alone. I live with my mother in next door apartment and provide my wife/kids with everything. I even forsake her in bed for over 3 months but this did not change her arrogance and rude attitude. She insults me behind my back but pretends to be a good muslimah in front of me. I thought about separation but I don’t think the problems would end as I have started hating her and she thinks I will not divorce her because of our disabled child. Should I divorce her and do the best I can for my son by asking her to live close to me so I can take over whenever necessary, in the evenings and weekends. Separation has other problems too that are even more grave. When you are not satisfying your physiologic desire with your spouse satan makes you look towards evil and that is a very difficult battle. I know there aren’t other solutions to this problem. May Allah forgive us all



I would say to prepare yourself for both scenarios, being separated and a time might come that either one of you will declare that it is not possible to continue to live together.

 

In most of such cases, people put sacrifice and here it is from both you and her for the sake of the child, in which indeed, the best for him to care physically and mentally is for both of you to stay together.

 

Staying together can be supported by counseling either spiritually by an Imam or to seek it professionally by an expert. I would really recommend this as a way to either heal issues or at least minimize its mental stress on both of you so you can enjoy the relationship or at least make less problematic.

 

But at the same time, if either decided this relation cannot continue, it happens. You need to obtain court divorce papers and take it to your local Imam to finalize it islamically. The judge will rule over custody, child support, caring and visitations etc. But as Allah the Almighty said, divorce should be in (Ihsan) excellence. Meaning you do more to your son as a father than what a court will tell you.

 

I hope and pray Allah the Almighty will bring the best for you both and your son, ameen.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.

Assalomu alaikum. I am a 16 year old girl, and my parents arranged a marriage for me. One thing that bothered me so much is the right of the husband where he can prevent his wife from working or going outside. Why is that? How can you say that Muslim women are liberated when basic public movement depends on their husband? As well as education, career, friends, even visiting parents? It seems like an oppression to me on every basis. While I understand that men are ordered to their wife well, he has the right to do any of the following I mentioned, it's in fiqh. I am just so uncomfortable and even one time thought about leaving my religion and it scares so much. Thank you for answering.



Wa `alaykum as-salamu wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.

 

I am not sure where do you live and what did you mean by arranged marriage and are you already married or not? If it was a forced marriage on you without your consent, then you have the right to revoke it with a judge. If it was just the social method used by parents to help find spouses to their sons and daughters with their mature consent, it should be fine.

 

A righteous husband should not prevent his wife from visiting parents, friends, seeking knowledge etc. In many cases, these matters should be taught to men and educated about basic principles in Islam.

 

As to work, it is in many cases if wives go to work and neglect their duty to care for house or kids, then the husband can ask his wife to focus on the priority; Family first.

 

Maybe if you talk to your husband and have mutual love and respect to each other I hope many of these issues will be solved insha Allah.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.

Assalamu Alykum, Someone told me that fasting the first ten days of Muharram is an expiation of sins for the past 10 years. Is this true?



Wa `alaykum as-salamu wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.

 

Fasting the 10th of Muharram or `Ashura’ will erase a year of sins that past but no reference about ten years for fasting the first ten days.

 

It is good to fast any days of Muharram but there is no such Hadith about ten days and ten years.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.

Asalaaam alaykun please i'd like to ask you, does it really matter to match genotypes before one can get married to a spouse.



Wa `alaykum as-salamu wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.

 

Not really but in many countries now they require couples to go get blood test to verify no harm will be inherited to kids born to that family.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.

I have just started university and i am very scared, i feel like there is nobody with me and i havent an idea what to do. I miss my mother so much it makes me value her so much but i know this is for the best. I just need help i dont know how to turn to Allah as i have sinned greatly in my life i feel on the verge of breaking down.



Focus on the good side of where you are at and remember that the prophet (peace be upon him) and Sahabah (his Companions) had to leave their hometown unwillingly and live in another town.

 

Try to be busy with that you came for and make use of your time, Avoid being lonely a lot. If there are other friends that can help you, keep busy with good things and keep company with them.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.

Assalam alikum this verse 55:56 says in them the Arabic word is fihinna instead of the normal fihima meaning there deep inside why are the women believers of this world deep inside instead of the normal does this mean that the female believers won't be allowed to see each other in person for meals and stuff because of fihinna meaning they can't see each other that they only see there husbands that there a reward isn't that unfair that the women can't see each other like the men as friends and that they stay inside the tents palaces and never come out 55:72



Wa `alaykum as-salamu wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.

 

Allah the Almighty is talking about two gardens in heaven and describing things in them. Read from verse number 46. The reference about Hoor E’in as lowering their gaze, is about not looking intimately to other men as a normal female will feel loyal to one man.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.

Asalaamu Aleiykum I have a question regarding some prayers again. So say if you have a job and you work from 5:30-11 pm and the prayers times that come in during work are Maghreb and Isha. Maghreb is at 7 and Isha is @8. If your boss only allows you to pray Maghreb but not isha because they are so close together and you would have to leave to go pray again could you wait and pray the Isha prayer before 12 or would that be considered delaying it? Also the place here I work at is a little small so considering it gets dark at 7:00 because it's getting close to winter time would it be permissible to pray outside? Regarding to praying it before 12 I don't think I would make it home in time pray the full prayer without it reaching past 12. So I'm in a difficult situation and I just started my job and I think I might not have one. JazakAllahu Khayra



Wa `alaykum as-salamu wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.

 

In short, pray Maghreb and delay Isha after you come home even if you have to do it after midnight. Isha time, the extended one, goes till Fajr according to most scholars.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.

Asalam u Alaikum Why in Islam it is obligatory or we can say strictly compulsory for a woman (wife) to respond to her husband's call for sexual intercourse? I mean why in first place it is punishable for women to be not interested in sexual intercourse at some time and y the same doesn't apply to the men folk? Isn't this a case of gender bias? If a man (husband) is not interested while the wife calls for it, why the husband is not punishable for not responding as it is in case of women? Thank you Gender Bias is the most debated topic in Islamic life style in the present era and we must have knowledge about these things.



Wa `alaykum as-salamu wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.

 

Marriage is a relationship of tranquility, love and mercy as mentioned in the Quran. Any wife that truly loves her husband would love to enjoy intimate relationship with him, it is a natural thing.

 

A husband should always consider his wife’s ability to be for him ready intimately. She might be tired or ill or had a real bad mood and intimate relationship should not be just a biological intercourse but rather two souls enjoying the best of their desires in a halal way. Also the husband should be responsive to the wife’s need if she desires it as it happens from both sides.

 

I must say too that a woman should not abuse her husband by refusing to allow him have intimate relationship with her! When a woman gets married it is called a Nikah contract which literally means allowing the husband for such right.

 

On the same note, a husband cannot abuse his wife by ignoring her for days and weeks without intercourse. If a man does that to his wife for a period over 4 months, she can take her case to the court and seek divorce.

 

In such cases like that it is best to seek counseling between the couples because most of the times it has to do with issues of problems between the husband and wife.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.

Assalam o Alaikum sir, Sometimes, in order to persue our career, living peacefully and living for our own selves, we all have a dream to move out of our parent’s homes to somewhere we dream, like the western world or etc.. My question is that whether women are allowed to live alone in a house abroad, earn or study, living for themselves and for their happiness?



Wa `alaykum as-salamu wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.

 

This matter depends on many factors like permission of family, safety, culture and reasons for travelling.

 

I do believe that Islam made it mandatory on women not to travel without a Mahram for the main reason of safety. So if safety is guaranteed or Mahram could be a group of trusted women rather than a male member of the family and the travel is of a necessity, it would be good to discuss that with your parents.

 

At the end, you do not want to pursue happiness for yourself and cause pain for your family.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.

Slamu alaikum I am from Kashmir (indian administered) and am working as a teacher (Govt.) and u might b aware of the fact that ours z a conflict zone. Here curfews (from govt. agencies) and Hartals is almost routine. On the Hartals days we can't attend the school and throughout the valley schools r being closed ( not by the order of govt.) and we r signing the arrival register for the previous (closed) day and the current day so that we can get full salaries. MY QUESTION Is that is it haraam. Last year In 2016 schools were closed (not by the order f govt) for more than six months becoz of curfew and Hartals. More than 90 people get killed Thousands get injured, hundreds maimed and blinded due to pellets and the situation was so tense that we couldn't open schools ( govt. as well as private). Govt imposed curfew for more than 5 months. After lit bit of normalcy we attended schools and we signed our arrival registers of six months in a single day. IS THAT earned salary of six months haraam because actually we didn't attend a single day in reality.???? Let me remind u the situation was so tense and hence could not attend schools. Wt can be done if that money earned is haraam. Thanking u



Wa `alaykum as-salamu wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.

 

Lying is not allowed in Islam and as you described it, it is a form of lying.

 

I suggest that you talk to the authorities to make it a rule that for teachers even if they do not teach they are paid their salaries because of the contract regardless of how many days were taught or not.

 

In many fields of jobs this is practiced that you hire someone and they can finish before time and their salary keeps rolling with agreement between two sides.

 

If you took money in that unlawful way, in the future try to donate to the poor upon ability every once a while some money to make up for the income your took unlawfully.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.

Is wearing shalwar kameez equal to covering urself completely without wearing the abaya?



Yes, it is if it meets the three main conditions for female dress codes in Islam.

 

1- Thick that you cannot see through.

 

2- Baggy not tight on your body.

 

3- Covering all your body except face, hands and feet.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.

I am taking medicines for mental illness. But at times I suspect whether I really have any mental illness and whether all that I experience is my moral weakness. How I can know which all of my actions and thoughts I have excuse for? How often should I repent? Should I follow all the steps of repentance each time or istighfaar is enough?



You basically need to check with a doctor to evaluate your mental illness.

 

This is a medical case that you should not neglect. If you need medical help, you should not delay it and if you do not, you should not take unneeded medications.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.

Aoa! I want to discuss very sensitive issue. I am in love with a man who is married since 7 years with a Chinese girl. He has two sons one is 7 yrs old and the other one is two months old. He wants to marry me but his family is against us. When he marry that Chinese girl he recite kalma and nikkah was offered. But after that till now she never practiced Islam nor she celebrated any of the Islamic festivals but she celebrates her ex religion festivals. Recently her father died and she performed all the non Islamic rituals of her ex religion and make her elder son to do so. Her family also ask my boy friend to perform those rituals but he refused. During the days of his wife's father death he came to know that she didn't told her family the he is Muslim and she also recites kalma. Now my boy friend wants to take elder son from her and marry me. I want to ask that is their marriage halal or haram? And if it's not halal then is it necessary to divorce her or their marriage automatically nullified??? Please reply as soon as possible JazakAllah



Wa `alaykum as-salamu wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.

 

A Muslim man can only marry a Muslim, Christian or a Jew. Any other marriage outside this is not Halal in Islam. I am not sure of his wife’s religion as you did not mention it.

 

Also, he needs to clear his record from legal marriage from the first if he wants to marry you depending on the rules of each country and regulations.

 

I am also not a favor of describing your relationship with him as being your boyfriend! That means there are some practices that could be Haram going on before a real Islamic marriage took place.

 

In all cases, when he is ready for marrying you, he must come and ask for your hand, with witnesses, with the approval of your father and putting Mahr.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.

Assalamualykum, my question today is it permissible for a husband and wife to FaceTime or video chat when they are away from each other and sexually desire each other?



Wa `alaykum as-salamu wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.

 

I would say it is better not or Makrooh for the possibility of such chats could be viewed by others in one way or another. In many times we take technology granted for privacy but the reality it is not. So if it was just texting or talking it should be no problem.

 

But I will be totally against having people show their private parts in intimate positions on such chats.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.

Assalamualaikum, I would like to know that if someone who is suffering from gasses problem, then is there any other option or again and again have to perform ablution



Wa `alaykum as-salamu wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.

 

Islam is built on accommodating people’s issues especially when it comes to medical problems.

 

First, you need to check with a doctor to make sure if there are any medications that you can take and it will help you control this issue.

 

If that is not a possibility, you only need to make wudu’ for each Salat and pray. Even if you pass gas during Salah, you can continue insha Allah and finish your salat.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.

Salam aleykum, I would like to know whether it is permissible to design and advertise Christmas chocolate products. Which include Christmas text and Christmas graphics such as santas etc. I am working at a graphic design company and often have to create these adverts around the Christmas time. JazakAllah khair.



Wa `alaykum as-salamu wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.

 

You should not. These are figures that represent a celebration promoting a main view that we totally disagree with about prophet Issa AS. Promoting a matter is like endorsing it in one way or another so I advise you to avoid it and seek other matters in business.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.

 

is there any verse from quran that we muslims are prohibited to celebrate any special occassion,aside from ramadan and hajj eid.like birthdays ,thanks giving days once you graduated or any special occasion that you will have esp for your kids.are not really allowed to do this? i just need enlightenment.im about to give a thanks giving blow out for my 3 yearold daughter.with her little friends ,as she enjoyed all those things like cakes candles costume party.i just want her to experience the joy of it.



No doubt as religious festivals we only have 2 holidays;`Eid Al-Fitr and `Eid Al-Adha. Declaring any other occasion as a festival to Muslims is not allowed. But we do recognize that people can celebrate the remembrance of certain historical moments like the birth of the prophet (peace be upon him), Isra’ and Mi`raj, etc. These celebrations should not be more than giving like a lecture reminding people about such occasions and seeking wisdom lessons learned from it.

 

Now social celebrations like graduation, welcoming someone after long travel, birthday of a child, or even celebrations about independence day, etc. are all just moments of gratefulness that people enjoy and there should be no problem in them even if it did include making some food or sweets.

 

In all celebrations, no haram should be practiced.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.

As salam alaykum waramotulah wabarakatuh, dear scholars, is it haram to bury dead (e.g imam)in mosque?



Wa `alaykum as-salamu wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.
It is not allowed, for it is a fast way for people to start thinking holy of such people. The prophet (peace be upon him) spoke about how people of the Book prior to us did that and ended up worshipping such people. The case of the prophet’s grave is different, for the expansion of the Mosque happened after his death (peace be upon him).

 

Almighty Allah knows best.

Salam. What does Islam say about going to registry in marriage. Is it permissible or not.



Wa `alaykum as-salamu wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.

 

It is OK because many countries require that for documentation or processing papers.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.

Assalamualaikum, I'm a 24 year old software engineer currently not working married for about 2 years and have a one year old baby. I live in joint family with mother in law father in law and 2 younger unmarried brothers of my husband I have sister in law. My husband is very noble religious guy. he loves me and his parents equally. Thing is his parents keep doubting him and me keep abusing us for nothing. Being the eldest daughter in law I do all my duties with a small child I take care off everybody the entire house but still his parents torture us a lot they keep saying my husband your wife is bad she does this that I'm so fed up of this of life crying alone deeply hurt. My husband asks me to have patience. He is also in depression because of them. We din think off separating as my husband wants to take care of his parents.. now the torture has such a level that my mother in law says she will kill me and my son of we get separated I'm really scared worried I don't really know what to do. Every day is like hell. They keep taunting and commenting. How many days I can live like this please help me out



Wa `alaykum as-salamu wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.

 

It is your right in Islam to have your own place with your husband. Unfortunately many husbands might not have the financial means to provide that to wives and for that families live with each other. We ask wives in many cases to practice patience with husbands until Allah makes it easy on them to move out and be free financially.

 

Now on the other hand threating of harm and even killing is a serious matter! I am not sure of the seriousness of such claim but it should not be taken lightly if you truly feel that she might harm you or your child.

 

I suggest that you talk to both your husband and your father in law and have them deal with your mother in law to stop such claim completely.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.

Assalam alikum I was just wondering what does this verse mean does it mean that if buddah was a prophet would of he had to come from Abrahams loins because he came after Abraham



Wa `alaykum as-salamu wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh.

 

{So very truly, We did, indeed, send Noah and Abraham [as messengers]. Thus We placed prophethood and the Scripture among their seed} 57:26.

 

There is no mention here of Buddah at all.

 

A prophet is only declared a prophet if mentioned in the Quran or in the authentic Sunnah and Buddah is not one of the prophets.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.

I got into nikkah about 5 months ago from Pakistan. My wife lives there and i have already applied her case for immigration but as u know its a long process. My wife works in Pakistan and she lives with her parents. We have gone through nikkah but havnt gone through all marriage ceremeonies as per tradition there. Whenever i go we both meet and talk but as former marriage ceremeony havnt happened so we cant get invovle into true husband wife relationship. Since last few months she is asking me to start providing her pocket money as she thinks that her right as a wife although we havnt gone to true marriage yet nor she is requiring it. My question am as per islam am i obliged to provide her pocket money although she dont need it and dont live in my house nor have any children of us and also not pregnant. What i know is that i have to provide my wife all financial support once she start living with me and we get into real husband wife relationship. Recently she asked me for mAcbook and i declined and she is making a mess as per her i am not providing her rights of wife as per islam



In short, although you are not bound to make the whole (Nafaqah) spending that includes house rent, bills, food, clothes etc. I see that you should send her some pocket money.

 

A Muslims should be generous and she is legally your wife on papers. I do recognize that the marriage has not been consummated yet but this is part of showing her how much you care and it will strengthen the relationship insha Allah.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.

Is the marriage valid after I've became a Muslim, but he is not, and doesn't not want to hear anything about Islam? What would be the next steps advised that could be taken on my side? Assalam alaikum, I've been married for almost six years. Before getting married, he'd display a respectful, responsible and positive behavior. I left my family, my country, and my career for this man. A few months after getting married, his attitude started to shift. While changes are expected, disrespectful behavior started to be a daily occurrence. Those behavior include cursing at me for no reason (publicly or privately), being agressive physically from time to time, accusing me of cheating when I've never even looked at another man in such a way, forbidding me to do anything outside the house, not lifting a finger around the house (coming home, sitting, waiting for food, sitting, going to bed), belittling me as a person and professional and recently, as I've became a Muslim, he also physically restrain me from Salah at home when he saw me, I cannot go to the Masjid... I pretty much cannot leave the house outside of going to work (he can see where is my car and my phone). I've been talking to him for the past 5 years on how we could evolve and improve this marriage. Nothing changed, he tend to laugh when I express how I feel about everything. And more recently, he plainly refused that I talk about Islam. At this point, it feels like I've been patient and caring. I kept on caring for him, the house and taking care of everything (from finances to cars, and doing his research papers for him back in University are just examples). I'm left feeling terrified of him, and feeling as I've done everything I could think of, that he has lost me. So this marriage wasn't in a place where it should have been even before me becoming a Muslim, but since then it's only been worst and traumatizing. So my questions come from here. Him being a non Muslim, me having became a Muslim, is the marriage valid? What would be steps that could be advised? (We do not have children). I truly look forward reading from you. Jazak Allahu khayr for all you do!



I will answer in two ways.

 

First, the things you mentioned if they were between two Muslim couples are good enough reasons to destroy a marriage. We have many cases in which husbands do not practice at all although Muslims and they prevent their wives to pray or put Hijab etc. And for that alone, a woman can take her matter to the Imam and ask for divorce just because of that.

 

Now that which you have described in your relationship is a reason for any woman to walk out from such a relationship even if he was a born Muslim.

 

Second, if a wife accepted Islam, she must invite her husband to accept Islam. If he refused, the most time allowed for a female to stay under a non-Muslim husband in case she accepted Islam is 3 months according to the most famous views in schools of thought. Some scholars extended this period if the husband is looking into studying Islam with the intention of conversion regardless of how long that period is.

 

It is all up to you.

 

Almighty Allah knows best.