I don’t even love him but I believed when I go to live with him, I will fall in love with him but since we got married last year until now we haven't met yet and it is stressful for me because I didn't obtain none of my objectives of marrying him.
I thought of divorce several times but he refuses. I'm sure of his love for me but it is not the case for me and with this distance is so hard for me to bear.
I want to know if the nikah at the place is valid, since we never met, is it my fault if I get divorced? Am I to wait for my holding period before I’m able to get remarried?
Answer
Wa `alaykum as-Salamu wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.
In the Name of Allah, Most Gracious, Most Merciful.
All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger.
In this fatwa:
As long as the marriage has been done according to the Shariah, it is valid. As for your situation, if you are unable to bear your husband’s long absence, you have the right to seek divorce from him.
Answering your question, Dr. Muhammad Salama, PhD, Islamic Studies in English, Associate Professor at the Faculty of Islamic Sciences al-Madinah International University (Mediu), states:
If the marriage contract has fulfilled its conditions and requirements and done with your consent, then this is a valid marriage in the sight of the Shari`ah.
But as a wife, you have rights on your husband and he has to fulfill these rights for you.
He should not leave you in such a situation. It is your right to ask for divorce becuae of your husband’s long absence. You can even go to the court if he refuses to divorce you willingly, because you do not get your rights as a wife. The court will decide in your favor.
As you have never consummated your marriage, there is no iddah (waiting period) due on you and you may marry the next day you get divorced.
Meanwhile, you have to strengthen your relation with Allah in order to protect yourself against any unlawful (haram) practices.
Observe the daily Prayers, try to observe fasting, associate with pious female friends, go to mosques, and try to make your time busy with useful and religious activities.
May Allah help you and protect you.
Allah Almighty knows best.
Editor’s note: This fatwa is from Ask the Scholar’s archive and was originally published at an earlier date.