Q Assalamu alaikum; I have a question regarding intimate relationships (Zina’a - adultry). I was married only once and divorced my husband (Khula’a) one year ago.

I have never once had any inappropriate relationships prior to marriage (or after) until two weeks ago. I have always stayed true to Allah (SWT), however, I’m worried that my actions with this person, who is a non-Muslim, will lead to my punishment in the Hereafter.

Unlike my previous husband, this man is honestly such a gentleman. I think this is why it all happened - this man is caring, genuine, honest, and has all the good aspects to look for in a relation. Together, we researched the consequences of what would happen if a Muslim woman engaged in this kind of relationship with a non-Muslim man prior to marriage.

I have committed Zina’a (adultery) and I am so afraid I will be condemned by Allah to hellfire. I have read it is not uncommon for humans to make mistakes and Allah (SWT) understands and forgives those who repent. I know what I did was wrong, but can you kindly speak to whether Allah (SWT) will hear my repentance, forgive my major sin, and not punish me in the Hereafter?

I am aware that only Allah (SWT) is the judge of this, but any information would be helpful. I understand repentance is being remorseful and abstaining from making the same mistake twice, but I find myself still wanting to engage in those acts with him because he is a real genuine individual. This is a basic human need, right? I’m finding it so difficult to find a good man to marry again.

In our culture, it is difficult for a widow to get remarried. I cannot endure the thought of remaining single for the rest of my life. I was never the type of person who thought to engage in intimate relations prior to marriage was okay. But I did…and, to be honest, I am conflicted because I really like this man. I just don’t know what to do. Please advise.