Answer
In this counseling answer:
• People who grow up with very little often learn to appreciate what they get later in life.
• For those who are born with challenging childhood, it depends on a lot of factors like, the individual him- or herself, their constitution, and their makeup, along with the environmental factors.
•Human beings are complex and human existence is as much art as it is science.
As-salamu `alaikum,
Often I think that is the case. People who grow up with very little often learn to appreciate what they get later in life. Of course, this also has to do with the individual and their non-material circumstances, such as their relationships with parents, and so on. I know of two people very close to me who grew up with very humble upbringings, and I have always admired their appreciation for what they have in life and the way they go about things.
Challenging Childhood
As for those who are born with physical or mental challenges of different kinds, again, I think it depends on a lot of factors, one of which is the individual him- or herself, their constitution, and their makeup, along with the environmental factors.
How were they raised — nurture vs. nature? Well, it’s both according to Islam. Were they brought up to feel sorry for themselves or with the notion that they could achieve anything if they worked hard enough and were dedicated enough? Again, I don’t think there is a real science to whether or not this happens. I think there are certain factors that, when present, can facilitate individuals to achieve amazing things in life. However, I don’t think it’s an across-the-board kind of law or principle.
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Human beings are complex and human existence is as much art as it is science. I think it important that we strive hard to learn about people and their life stories, such as
- Their fears
- Their motivations
- Their worldviews
- Their upbringing
Rather than putting simple labels on groups of people or assuming that people are like plants and animals (as if condition A exists, then B will result every time).
The beautiful and miraculous aspect of human existence is seen in its mystery and richness. We should embrace this, I believe, by striving to understand people as individuals and approaching each individual life and life story as a sacred manifestation of the Creator’s greatness and mercy.
We often like to clump people into neat little categories and generalizations, which completely undermines any appreciation for Allah’s creative genius. By doing so, we also assume to know everything about people, making it convenient to pass judgment on them without getting to the truth. This is really un-Islamic in my opinion, but we all do it and should therefore remind ourselves to be mindful of its dangers.
Salam.
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