Answer
In this counseling answer:
•One way to diminish the distress is by letting her know what to expect. You can help her with this by showing her videos of fireworks on YouTube.
•You can create a more comforting surrounding for her on the night by surrounding her in items that bring her comforts such as a special blanket or toy.
•You could even get her some earplugs or muffs to cover her ears whilst she is also distracted doing things she enjoys, or even sleeping it’s late.
Assalamu alaikum WaRahmatullah barakatuh,
It is understandable why you feel so anxious to find ways to help your daughter in the build-up to a day when fireworks are commonly set off. You know from previous experience that she has responded badly to the sounds of them. This can be as distressing for you as for her. You want to do your best to make things easier for both her and yourself.
Your problem is not an uncommon problem. Therefore, there are several different ways in which you can minimize the distress that might be potentially caused by this night.
Firstly, if she knows what to expect, then her anxieties may be reduced. You can help her with this by showing her videos of fireworks on YouTube. She will be able to see colors and hear the noises created by fireworks from the safety of her own house on a screen that can be turned off anytime. This will give her some control as well as an idea what to expect. It will help her to see that no harm has come to anyone as a result of the fireworks.
Furthermore, you can create a more comforting surrounding for her on the night by surrounding her in items that bring her comforts such as a special blanket or toy. This will also help to create positive associations between the sounds of fireworks whilst feeling safe in her home. If she still feels unsafe and disturbed, you could even get her some earplugs or muffs to cover her ears whilst she is also distracted doing things she enjoys, or even sleeping it’s late.
Another means to create positive associations and even turn the fireworks into a hit of fun is to turn into some kind of game. You could do this by simply allowing her to keep a tally of the number of fireworks she hears. Or, even more fun would be if you turned it into a game where every time you hear a firework go off you have to pretend to be an animal and the other person has to guess which animal the other is.
This will not only keep her relaxed but will again associate something positive with the sound of fireworks, therefore changing the negative link between fireworks and anxiety to one of happiness and fun.
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Furthermore, if she sees you relaxed during the times when fireworks are going off, she is more like to mirror your behavior and behave in a relaxed manner also.
May Allah make things easy for you both and ease your and her anxieties.
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Disclaimer: The conceptualization and recommendations stated in this response are very general and purely based on the limited information provided in the question. In no event shall AboutIslam, its counselors or employees be held liable for any damages that may arise from your decision in the use of our services.
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