My Husband Has Turned So Nasty Towards Me

03 October, 2019
Q Assalamu alaikum,

Late last year, my marriage broke down when my husband sent me a text message declaring it was over. Since then, my life has become a huge mess. My physical, mental, and emotional health has become severely affected and I’m undergoing treatment with medication and counseling.

However, the situation with my husband is yet to be resolved. Under UK Law, we are still married, but we’re living apart. My husband was hoping for a quick and easy divorce, but under the UK law, my husband and I own assets that need to be equally shared first.

My husband is being difficult about it and believes that I shouldn’t be entitled to anything as he covered my day to day expenses and such during our marriage. However, prior to our marriage and during it, I worked full time and contributed towards the assets that we jointly own.

When I got married, my mehr (dowry) was set to only £100 for the sake of the nikah, as we both resided in the UK and its law would take precedency over Shariah Law in the event of a divorce. However, it seems that my husband and his family now want to rely on mehr and not offer me the proper settlement which I am entitled to under the law.

Even more so, my husband and my family have started to spread malicious stories about me in order to tarnish my reputation in my local community. These actions are further affecting my mental health.

Prior to my marriage breaking down, I offered prayer regularly and continued to despite everything that happened since last September. However, I feel that I am now starting to really struggle and I feel that there is no hope left for me and that Allah SWT is punishing me.

At times, I wanted to take my own life. I don't understand why this happened the way it has. My husband was once a loving, generous, and kind man, but now he’s turned so nasty towards me. I still miss him and I don't know how I will get by without him now.

What should I do? Please advise me. Thank you.

Answer

Salam Alaikum,

In this counseling video, you will learn:

Try marriage counseling, or sit down with family members from both sides to reconcile.

Remember, your reward is with Allah. No matter what people say about you; Allah is the Most Just.

Do things that you enjoy; take care of yourself.

Disclaimer: The conceptualization and recommendations stated in this response are very general and purely based on the limited information provided in the question. In no event shall AboutIslam, its counselors or employees be held liable for any damages that may arise from your decision in the use of our services.

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About Hannah Morris
Hannah Morris is a mum of 4 and she currently works as Counsellor and Instructor of BSc. Psychology at the Islamic Online University (IOU). She obtained her MA degree in Psychology and has over 10 years of experience working in health and social care settings in the UK, USA, and Ireland. Check out her personal Facebook page, ActiveMindCare, that promotes psychological well-being in the Ummah. (www.facebook.com/activemindcare)